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Monday, October 01, 2007

My Blogging History & Evolution Revealed

October is my blogging anniversary month. It isn't this blog's anniversary but it's a commemoration of the month when I started blogging. My blog was first hosted in Tabulas. That blog simply served as an avenue for bursting out whatever bubble I had. Although, as I've mentioned last year, there were a bit of relevant posts somehow (although not as serious as some of those posted here in Always Anxious - if you'll consider them serious). I was browsing through the old blog (yes it's still up but I might delete it soon) and found one of my funny reply to a comment: "kaya loves kita eh naiintindihan mo me" Haha! Langya, nagsusulat pala ako ng ganun dati. But it goes to show that I already grew up (because of the efforts to learn more). I'd like to think I've changed for the better. Haha!

In 2004, I decided to have my blog hosted in Blogger. I'm trying to think of the reason for that decision but I can't think of a precise one. Maybe because I matured a bit that time, haha, and I found the format of Tabulas too pa-girl and pa-teenager. Only a few friends (3 ata but as if ang dami naman ngayon) were into blogging then. I don't have that much audience and I haven't actually explored the wonders of blog communication. It's unknown to most of Always Anxious's readers (I don't know how many) that this blog's original name was Looking Within. The first post was about my being religiousless - Unlike my Sabbath Day.


As far as I can remember, I named it as such for the simple reason that I've lots of repressed emotions then (as if I'm not that repressed now, haha). I can't remember when I actually changed the name of the blog to Always Anxious. For those people who personally know me, I don't think I really have to explain the rationale behind the title. And actually for those who don't know me, the blog posts here are enough to give you an idea why the blog's name is such.


From 2004-2005, I had very few posts. I was too lazy then to actually write everyday. Well, I was not exposed to any interesting things as well.Not to mention, I was dependent on a slow-provincial internet connection. Okay, honestly, I didn't have readers (aside from that 2 college classmates). Why the hell should I publish my musings online? And in 2005, I worked in an office where access to the Internet is limited (isa lang ang computer na may Internet).


Good thing that in 2006, I got a chance to work for an IT company. The Internet connection was good. Aside from that, I've met people who are interested in conversations be it online or offline. So I decided to go back to blogging. From then on (haha, parang fairy tale), I've become an active blogger.


While I always wished to write something that's not too personal, it seems that having a blog is a form of temptation to write anything you want. Which is why I decided to set-up some sort of personal blog. Eventually I realized that there's no need for that personal blog. There are things about us that need not be shared with anyone or at least should only be shared with special people. And why do I have to post it online? That other blog has been closed (not really deleted).


Now, I'm sticking to Always Anxious. Maybe in the future, I might probably register a domain or create another blog that is thematic or more focused on a subject. I would want to make this blog something useful to other people (not a narcisistic venture, haha). I'll try my best that even if I write something personal, other people can benefit or relate with it at least. I don't know what this blog can offer. But I know that writing is something I love (I'm just unsure if it's loving me back). Nonetheless, I want to make this blog as an avenue to develop the skill.


Thanks to friends (and blog-hoppers) who've been patient enough (and somehow interested) to devote a minute or so in reading (and even commenting) my posts.

2 comments:

jenpot said...

hapi "blogging" anniversary!!! ehehe :P

alwaysanxious said...

Salamat, jen :)