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Tuesday, August 07, 2007

By Chance

Casual sex is apparently a "common thing" in call centers (with all the scandals out in the Internet etc.). For some people, it is their way of relieving themselves from stress. But according to a friend's friend, it is something that doesn't only happen in call centers. It actually happens almost everywhere. And I agree with him.

I've met a lot of people who are really into it. Casual sex happens for the simple reason that it is just like any other form of “nature call.” Another way of looking at is in the idea that it can also be comparable to smoking and drinking. In short, it is simply something that the body desires (urges) that must be satisfied.

But even if sex is a natural human desire, considering it as something casual is just off.

During our conversation (on a lazy Sunday afternoon), a friend shared her observation of a group. She said that casual sex is really common in that group. She said, “palit-palitan lang sila ng partners among the group.” I was also reminded of an incident where another friend was casually asked by a client if she’s open to having a FUBU (Honestly, I only came to know that term because of her story). Ergo, casual sex is a pretty-much acceptable activity among a lot of people.

"Nasaan ba tayo noon nauso iyan? Bakit hindi tayo nakakarelate sa kanila?" These were the common questions we had during our conversation. Another friend uttered, "So talagang nangyayari na ang "Sex in the City" sa atin?”

Not Our Thing

It seems that the simple reason we had those questions is the fact that casual sex isn’t our thing. We all agreed that it is something we can never imagine ourselves doing. It is not because we are conservative (I can be a bit “manang” sometimes but I don’t consider myself as “real” conservative). We premised our perspective on the adverse effect that casual sex might cause which is, damage to health. The religion perspective is not an issue at all.

Having multiple partners allows for possible transfer of communicative diseases. Just imagine exchanging body fluids to different people. It is undeniable that there's a greater risk of being afflicted by any form of disease in every physical (sexual for that matter) contact with another person.

The immorality I see (if that's the apt term) with casual sex is not the immorality that the church dictates. It is something unacceptable (immoral) for the simple reason that such act can be a probable cause for another person's damage.

Casual Sex vs. Pre-Marital Sex

There’s a big difference between casual sex and pre-marital sex. The former is something I find personally unacceptable while the latter is something that can be tolerated. The rationale is simple. In pre-marital sex, there’s at least some level of accountability and sense of security. Meaning, you are doing the act because you are somehow committed to each other. Meanwhile, in terms of security, since you are committed, it’s less likely that your partner is having multiple sexual contacts at least during the time that you are together (assuming that he/she is honest).

Of course, in pre-marital sex, given that you are in a relationship, there’s something to look forward to in the future. It’s not merely about undressing yourself and releasing the urge.

Casual Sex and Prostitution

Since casual sex is something that’s happening and is in fact tolerated by a lot of people, I’m really convinced that prostitution must be legalized. Technically, getting a prostitute is a form of casual sex except that you have to pay for the service. If there are a lot of people tolerating casual sex, why can’t we legalize prostitution? I think legalizing prostitution encourages a better (and safer) form of casual sex. Not to mention the opportunity you give to those people who are in this industry (See previous post on legalizing prostitution –haven’t finished writing the 2nd part though— to have an idea what I mean by providing opportunity.)

Sabagay, iisipin ng iba na dun na lang sila sa libre (kahit hindi sigurado) kaysa dun pa sa magbabayad ka… Oh well…

Addendum:

Probably, the growing number of people venturing into casual sex gives reason to establishing a business like this:





2 comments:

missingpoints said...

Casual sex should be done only by informed participants. Meaning, they know the risks and take the necessary precautions. Sleeping around while harboring a disease is bad, doing so while healthy is fine.

It won't be "solved" by legalizing prostitution. (although i am for it). There's a big difference between sleeping with someone whom you find attractive and sleeping with someone because you paid her to. The former is a mutual understanding of sorts, the latter is an economic transaction.

alwaysanxious said...

^ But the question is how will one know that the other isn't afflicted of any disease? I mean, for someone who's after satisfying his/her urge, would you be open to anyone about your health condition? Even some of those who are in a relationship hide such thing. Anyone can lie. There isn't any certainty right?

Not that legalizing prostitution will "solve" casual sex but the "acceptability" of it can be enough ground for people to accept that thought of legalizing prostitution. And people who are into casual sex, could probably prefer paying someone instead of sleeping with someone he/she is uncertain of (meaning the health status).

Gah, maybe I'm turning too "manang." But you know, it's hard to imagine undressing yourself, exchanging fluids, etc. with another person whom you don't have or wouldn't actually have any serious relationship with.

How can you face that person after "the day"? Like, he/she has seen everything about you. Then, it was just nothing. Oh well...